BucketHatism: Spring Game

ALL RISE!!! Court is now in session. The honorable Bucket Hat King LJ tha Fiasco presiding. Please be seated and come to order”

Please be seated.  Saturday afternoon marked the beginning of the long 4 1/2 month wait for tailgating, horrible football taeks, bold ACC predictions, and CARDS-FIRST-DOWN chants (more on this later).   Sure the baseball team is rolling through Spring with it’s eyes set on Omaha.  The NBA Playoffs also known as “when the pros actually try” has begun but lets not act like the dead period is not quickly approaching.  So if you didn’t make it out to the Spring Game I would suggest you invest in YouTube and catch some old games. Fact of the matter is, the Spring Game is just a nice fix until September.

So until then we try to focus on other things to bide our time whether its finally finishing a home project or binge watching every series on Netflix.  Saturday gave us great weather and a reason to tailgate and drink before noon…….not that some of us needed it. As I chowed down on some BBQ with Halo sauce courtesy of Saint’s and listened to TBG tell a story of an overzealous buddy who’s mouth was bigger than his football skills, I jotted some notes down about the Spring game that you can read below.

Any outburst from the court and you will be removed by the bailiff @ferncreekmic who not only looks like he benches 400lbs as a warmup but also has the best smoker/grill/what the hell is this BBQ contraption and how do I get one in Louisville.  Try him….I dare ya.

  • We have Lamar Jackson, and as long as that is still true we are going to be okay.  Now I am not a QB guru and I cannot pretend I know about reads and whatnot but from my view inside Tom Jurich Cardinal Stadium (the PJ was dropped for reasons I don’t need to explain but will later) he looks like his footwork is better as well as his accuracy. His screen passing improved and of course he looked like he is content with being a pass first QB this year.  Also, the offensive line gave him some time to throw the damn ball so that is always a plus.


  • Well hello there Mr. Fitzpatrick!  We knew that you were going to be a special player and it was nice to finally see you on the field. I am not one of those people who claim a player is great off of a Spring Game performance but it is very apparent that Lamar has a new target. Dez runs great routes and can also make adjustments mid-air.  I can’t wait to see him against Purdue. Suck it Nebraska


  • I can’t give you a grasp on the defense yet because the teams had a mix of starters and reserves.  So I will reserve judgement on Peter Sirmon after I see us against other teams.  Also, when your defense is up against the best player in college football you have to give them a pass.


  • Other than some high snaps Robbie Bell played a nice game at the Center position.  It was refreshing to see the Offensive Line play disciplined football.  Apparently this was not enough for a group of fans sitting behind us who hated everything about the entire game.  I am not exaggerating this folks.  This couple behind us literally had a negative comment for everything. Now I can take some complaining fans, ……Twitter has me conditioned for this……, but I cannot take a complaining fan with horrible taeks.  Bruh, it was bad, Like Sweeney and Lach bad.  Like Colin Cowherd bad.  Like Dick Vitale with a megaphone bad.  Like Digger Phelps and Doug Gottlieb bad.  Like Dan Dakich on a panel for 5th year transfers bad. Like boneless wings and bleu cheese bad,  but I digress.   At one point this lady said that she misses a certain player. I will not mention that players name but NO lady, just NO.  Her tickets should be revoked. Sorry for my rant there.


  • Enjoy Jaire Alexander while you can. This is his last year in a Cardinal uniform, and that is solely my opinion.  I can see him being a 1st round pick or at least 2nd round. Again, I am not Mel Kiper or Todd McShay but that dude is a baller and will play on Sundays.


  • I love Reggie Bonnafon to death but I really hope he does not end up at RB full time. Granted we were without 3 RB’s on Saturday and you could tell there were some struggles there.  BUT, this Tavion Graves killed (sorry if I misspelled it) was a beast.  Dude ran low to the ground and hard each time. I wouldn’t be surprised to see him get some reps next year.  Also, Trey Smith is another back that had a decent game.


  • Seth Dawkins is good, that is all.


  • It was good to hear James Hearns name being called on Saturday along with Cornelius Sturghill.  Both recovered from gunshot wounds suffered last season and it was nice to have them back on the field.


  • After what seems like a decade, it was good to see Jawon “Puma” Pass finally take the field.  He made some mistakes, which was expected, but the great thing is he has a great QB coach as well as a QB whisperer in Bobby Petrino.  The interceptions were a bit disappointing but I am not putting a lot of stock into them, it happens and he will learn from it. Put it like this, if he throws an interception during his first college pass then he will be great. Don’t believe me??  Ask Teddy and Lamar how their first pass in a real college game went and what kind of career each had after?  Yeah I thought so……


  • Sean Moth can never miss another football game again. I am not sure who the PA announcer was on Saturday but that happens once and it doesn’t happen again. It was like someone changed the teleprompter on Ron Burgundy.  And that’s good, for a Cards First Down???  Are you sure or are you asking??  We all got a dose of life after Sean Moth and we are not ready.  Never leave Sean, never leave.                           (EDITORS NOTE: Let’s not forget the first one. That’s good for another Louisville first down!)


  • Shout out to the kid in front of us that turned into the seat narc and made sure we knew that the seats were taken the entire first half. You have a bright future in douche-ism kid.


  • The TJCS  expansion is coming along nicely although it is very weird not having the replay screen in the North end zone.  Also it is weird not seeing Johnny Unitas or the players coming out of the tunnel.  I can’t wait to see the finished product.


  • Speaking of TJCS,  I vote we permanently rename the stadium after Tom Jurich. Call it Tom Jurich Cardinal Stadium at Lamar Jackson field for all I care. I just refuse to give credit to a guy who’s pizza only tastes good when you are drunk and desperate.  Also, you are a grown man who still pulls rank in a board meeting, how lame is that?  The great thing about the expansion is that we no longer have to be subjected to your over-the-top entrance in your ozone killing machine. Papa is in the house and no one gives a damn.  Give Papa his sippy cup and tell him his better ingredients still aren’t good enough to be the best pizza in Jefferson County.


  • Speaking of drunk idiots, I saw one in particular who has a lot to say on a shi**y blog radio show but is quiet as a church mouse in public.  But once again I digress.


  • Back to the game.  The offensive line did look a little better on Saturday, granted Mike Summers has not had a lot of time but I expect them to be in tune and ready to go by September.


  • This was the first time the RRTG let me down.  Hurt my pride that they were out of bourbon but I gave them a mulligan. That happens once and never again Dave.


  • Good to see all the former players on Saturday. Mike Bush, Harry Douglas, Mario Urrutia, and countless others.  I know the attendance was a the main topic but who cares.  It’s easter weekend on a 80 degree day. We are not on the level of Bama or Ohio State so stop comparing us and just enjoy the crowd that was there. Besides, its a Spring Game. 14k would only have me worried if it was a regular season game.


  • CJ Avery and Cole Bentley should see some significant time next season.  So glad both are getting valuable experience as true freshman.


  • Good to see Mickey Crum out there again. He and Charles Standberry are going to be counted on this upcoming season.


  • GREAT to see Emonee Spence back on the field.  That guy was someone I was interested to see but injuries has hampered him so far.  I can see him playing a much bigger role along with JaVante Bagley.


  • Gonna miss Kyle Bolin who announced he will transfer for his last year of eligibility.  I will never forget that you Mr. Bolin kept the Cayuts from bowling. I will also never forget the fact that through it all you remained positive on the field even after losing the starting spot.  That is the kind of teammate every team wants.  Godspeed to you wherever you end up.

And in closing I cannot emphasize enough how much I hate the dreaded dead season but luckily the good folks at Cardinal Sports Zone and myself are planning some big things for the 2017 Football season. Stay tuned for that. Also new episodes of “The Nest” will return along with candid interviews with athletes and coaches. Good times to be had. I have to replenish my bucket hat collection and start the TJCS movement.  I will see you all in Indianapolis.  Until then, be cool in this hot city.

Court adjourned (bangs gavel)




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